Since the national shortage of canned dog food is apparently behind us, all our dogs’ favorite brands in all their favorite flavors are stowed back in the closet, which allows a moment of quiet reflection.

A couple of questions came to my mind as I stared at a row of double-stacked cans that held our mutt’s preferred preparation – Pedigree Chopped Ground Dinner Filet Mignon Flavor, subtitled “Made With Real Beef.”

First, who has to call that the jelly-like bread with the pink substance in the can actually tastes like filet mignon? Are there professional dog food tasters like chocolates, wine and coffee? If so, I doubt they are paid enough.

I suspect that canned dog food can dispense with all standards for taste labeling. For one, they know dogs can’t read, so make sure the Kennel Club set doesn’t cause setback. Second, chances are that anyone who suspects a dog food doesn’t really taste like filet mignon isn’t willing to do a verifying taste test and then force a judge and jury to do the same.

After doing a little research on the labeling of canned dog food, I found that by labeling one type of dog food as “dinner” only 25% of the contents of a can need to come from the meat product listed on the label, which is the case with our dogs is “real beef” plus a smidgeon with a “natural filet mignon flavor”.

Our mutt’s popular filet mignon-in-a-can is known as “chopped dinner”. Its contents may be given a double dose of mechanical tenderization to approximate the texture of filet mignon.

The Compound Canine Corps’ next favorite flavor, Pedigree Chopped Ground Chicken and Rice Dinner, has a label that says it is “made from real chicken.”

Contrary to what, I wondered.

Now that January is over, this area is already overdue for a list of current and planned events to appear in 2021. In the unlikely event, there is someone who is even more in touch with what is hot and what is not if I . Here goes:

Out: hoarding toilet paper / shortage

In: Hoarding grape nuts / bottlenecks

Out: elimination of the electoral college

In: Elimination of the filibuster

Out: The Bernie Sanders team

In: The Bernie Sanders meme

Out: boots on the ground

Out: Air Force One